So the year is 2013 and Blip.tv is no more and your friend actually does have to move her videos over to YouTube and that’s no big deal, right? And there’s this thing called AdSense and it gets her Ad revenue on said videos and that’s cool, right? And then that takes off but that AdSense account it under her personal Social Security Number and I don’t know if you know anything about tax code in the old U.S. of A. but that becomes a PROBLEM in the Year of Our Lord 2018 when she goes and Incorporates this weird Internet content-creating life. Suddenly, this is no longer personal—it’s BUSINESS.
So you figure, eh, let me help her swap over her Adsense from her Social Security Number (SSN) to her fancy pants new Employer Identification Number (EIN). But, huh, Adsense won’t let you. In fact, it won’t let you even change her account from Personal to Business. Weird. I mean, she can’t be the first YouTuber to WANT to do this, right?
But no, you can’t just update your personal account, you have to create a BUSINESS account and then update your YouTube channel to this new AdSense. Expect there’s a small army’s worth of terrifying tales of people who have lost their monetization. PERMANENTLY. And worse, in the world of AdSense, there is no clear way to fix this if it happens. Even the Help Forum’s advice is You Are Shit Out of Luck.
Well, damn. I mean, you don’t want to be the asshole friend who PERMANENTLY DE-MONETIZED my friend’s YouTube channel, right??! So you try to find a clear answer, or a human, or SOMEONE, anyone to give you a safe game plan on how to update this sort of thing. Heck, you’d take a robot at this point!
A couple of months later, all you’re really sure of is that no one actually WORKS at AdSense, not even SkyNet. No email. No number. Just that damn. Help. Forum. Even your friendly neighborhood YouTube account contact who you only have because you have more than 400K subscribers but less than 1 million has no idea how to contact AdSense to get a clear answer for you.
And then you realize…
Adsense IS the Bad Place.
So you create this website, angrydaydrinking.com because, well, you need a domain to try to create a whole new AdSense account because maybe if you just start FRESH this will all blow over. And you know what you’re about in the Year of Our Lord 2018 and you have no delusions of Supreme Court grandeur although turns out that doesn’t even matter if you’re an angry, rich, white man backed by other angry, rich, white men who can still look in the mirror without shame, joke’s on YOU, D.A.R.E.—
And you figure, hey, this will be great for that SquareSpace sponsorship AND for creating an AdSense business account with a new email because you need a website to create a new Adsense business account. So you write some blog posts and you add the link to your friend’s video and you fluff some here and post a bit there and buy some Getty images because you want to keep this legit.
You submit the domain, and a day later—
Now, the BEST thing about AdSense, you say, voice dripping with sarcasm, is that they don’t tell you how much is sufficient content. And some posts seem to suggest that there’s no point in submitting a website that’s less than 30-60 days old.
And that’s about the time the old bottle of Writer’s Tears comes off the shelf.